A Solution Focused Approach to Working with Couples
with John Henden

One Day Intensive Online Workshop via Zoom
Tuesday, 26 May 2026

Workshops run - 9 am - 3.30 pm

This interactive, one-day training will be in the form of an experiential workshop to maximise skills acquisition. Attendees will hear about ways of working, share casework examples, see live demonstrations and practice the skills.

Learning Outcomes/Workshop Objectives

At the end of the workshop, participants will be able to:

Describe how the basic SFBT principles, assumptions, beliefs, tools & techniques are applied to couple work
Highlight the most helpful and useful questions to ask each spouse/the couple
Feel more confident in their work, generally, with the widest range of couple work
Show an appreciation of communication patterns, and common sources of conflict in intimate partnerships
Appreciate the importance of skills in active listening and empathic responding to each spouse
Name some key repetitive interactional patterns (e.g. pursuer-distancer; parent-child) and learn interventions to disrupt them constructively
Appreciate the importance of confidentiality, avoidance of dual alliances, and managing disclosures within the couple context
Know how to build strategies for de-escalation, safety planning, and onward referral when working with couples in distress
Develop effective working relationships with each spouse and the couple

PowerPoint slides and posters & course handouts will be referred to throughout the day. There will be exercises in pairs, threes and small groups.

This training will cover:

Aims and objectives
Hopes and expectations
Outline plan for the workshop
Scaling confidence in working with couples
Reminder of the basic principles, beliefs and assumptions of SFBT
Acknowledgement and validation of thinking and feelings within each spouse
Formula First Session Task
Problem-free talk and joining with the couple
Most common causes of conflict/disagreement
Exceptions to the problem/difficulty/conflictual situation
Generational patterns
The relationship flow chart, revisited
The most helpful solution focused questions and statements for couple goals
Fast Forwarding the DVD of the couple’s life/individual lives
‘The Link Statement’ and Scaling
The most important presuppositional language within couple work
Reframing absolute statements and demonstrating their unhelpful nature (egs: “He/she never…”; “She/he always…”)
Utilisation of strengths and qualities
Pre-session change and between-session change
Generating possibilities, including the ‘worst case’ scenario for the couple
‘Watering the flowers, not the weeds’ in the couple’s life
Maneuverability and neutrality in couple work
Paradoxical intention (reverse psychology)
The 4 x stage process for second and subsequent sessions
Couples’ attempted solutions
‘Degrimming’/use of humour
Diverse couple working
Casework examples
The power of compliments
Small steps towards the couple’s goal
The SF Feelings Tank for each
‘Wise old you’ and ‘The deathbed scenario’ in couple work
Between-session tasking
3-part ending of a couple session

Underlying Principles for Attendees

Best practice for those working with couples:

Keep an open mind
Make no judgements at the outset and/or as the work proceeds
Maintain a stance of maneuverability and neutrality as the work unfolds
Ensure safety, keeping one’s ‘antennae’ sharpened for any safeguarding red flags
Be hopeful and optimistic that the couple will arrive at a solution which is satisfactory to them
Be curious and creative in their thinking and questioning
Focus on solutions, not problems as the work unfolds, shifting the couple’s attention from what's wrong to ‘what works’
View couples as the experts in their own relationship, being capable of identifying what will improve things
Be on the lookout throughout for small changes or minor shifts in behaviour or perspective which can lead to significant relational improvements
Be aware of and prepared for all possible outcomes

Who Should Attend

This Solution Focused Approach to Working with Couples training is designed both to upskill newly qualified and long-serving psychotherapists and counsellors.

NOTE - If your organisation is interested in having John Henden present a private professional development (CPD) face-face workshop in October / November 2026, to between 15 to 40 members of your team, please contact Faye Johnson for more information.

If you do not have sufficient numbers within your team, we recommend you consider opening the training up either to other Branch’s of your organisation or other region-based community agencies you work with. We have worked with many organisations this has worked well for - contact us for further information.

Price & Registration Information

One Day Online Workshop
$335.00 inclusive of GST

The price stated is per person. Payment in full is required before commencement of the training.

Contact us for a discount if you're registering more than 5 people. A discount is also available for Students or unfunded attendees.

Payment online is by Debit or Credit Card: VISA, Mastercard or American Express only and there are 3 easy steps to complete the online booking process. Our registration platform is hosted by Lil Regie, our NZ based booking agent.

Upon completing your registration by hitting the blue 'Confirm Booking' button, you will receive an automated email from Lil Regie confirming the booking and amount paid by credit card. This will appear on your statement as from LIL REGIE LTD WELLINGTON.

A GST Tax Invoice showing your payment in full will also be emailed to you.

If you have any issues or questions about your booking, please contact Faye Johnson

Can't pay online and require an invoice?

We work hard to ensure that all workshops are cost effective by automating our systems. If your organisation is unable to use our automated booking system and pay by credit/debit card and therefore require an invoice instead to pay by direct bank credit, there will be a $25.00 inc GST surcharge for this, and you will need to supply the following please:

The full organisation name and postal address required to appear on the invoice.
The contact name and email of the person(s) responsible for authorising this expense and approving payment.
Any purchase order references required on vendor invoices.

Please email this information to Brian - accounts@grow.co.nz and faye@grow.co.nz , and along with the Invoice we will also send you a special booking link which will come up as free of charge. Through this link you will need to complete your registration.

PLEASE NOTE:

Payment in full is required before commencement of the training.
If you require an Invoice and you are seeking funding approval, please include this surcharge in the price you have on your application.

Our workshops fill quickly so if you would like to reserve a place, please contact faye@grow.co.nz

What happens if you have to cancel?

We know that sometimes your plans can change for many different reasons. Should you be unable to attend, a substitute delegate is welcome to attend at no extra cost. If a substitute delegate is not available and you need to cancel your registration, please be aware of the following:

Face-Face Events - Up to 7 days prior to the event you will be provided a refund of your registration cost, less a $60.00 inc GST per attendee service charge.

Online Events - Up to 7 days prior to the event you will be provided a refund of your registration cost, less a $20.00 inc GST per attendee service charge.

If you cancel within 7 days of the event, you are not eligible to receive a refund. Please note: should your registration not be paid by the time of the event, you are still liable to make the payment. Unpaid accounts may be passed over to our debt collection agency and additional costs may be incurred.

All cancellations must be received in writing (email).

Training is cancellable by GROW with 7 days’ notice if a minimum number of attendees is not met and full refunds will be provided.

Delegates are responsible for their own travel/accommodation bookings and no compensation will be made should the event be rescheduled or cancelled.

For more information see our full Terms of Trade.

Book Training Now - 26 May

The following peak bodies and organisations recognise that the training we offer is of a high quality, evidence based and relevant for their members professional development (CPD) - 20 points per day.

Find out more about John's Book - Preventing Suicide: the Solution Focused Approach. Second edition.

Find out more about John's other book: What It Takes To Thrive

About The Presenter

JOHN HENDEN is an international trainer, author, therapist, and performance coach. Based in the UK, for over 20 years he worked within UK NHS mental health services firstly as a practitioner, then as a manager, during a time of rapid change. He delivers a wide range of training courses; and also provides organisations with personal coaching and mentoring services.

In addition to working with GROW (NZ), his client list includes UK NHS and SSAFA Trusts, Compass Ltd (NZ), CRUSE, HM Forces, Helsinki Psychotherapy Institute, Korzybski Institute (Belgium) Local Authorities, HM Prison Service, Compass Seminars Australia, SF Academy, Singapore and Krotkoterminowej Therapy Centre, Poland and Lviv-Bryukhovychi Seminary, Ukraine.

John has a background in psychology, is a qualified counsellor and a member of the British Association of Counselling and Psychotherapy (BACP). He is also a presenter at both the European Brief Therapy Association (EBTA) and Solutions in Organisations Link-up (SOL), being a founder member of the latter.

John delivers a broad portfolio of intensive solution focused brief therapy workshops to many and various organisations, enabling staff to be more time- and cost-effective. Also, he has developed a special interest in three specialist areas.

The first of these is Solution Focused Recovery from Severe Trauma & Stress. As a SF therapist, he has worked successfully with many survivors of traumatic experiences such as military combat, armed robbery, near-death experiences, rape, road traffic accidents and sudden death. John teaches how both the basic SF techniques and advanced techniques are applied, for successful outcomes with such clients. His two books on the subject are:

Henden, J. (2011). Beating Combat Stress: 101 Techniques for Recovery. Wiley-Blackwell; and,
Henden, J. (2017). What it Takes to Thrive; techniques for severe trauma & stress recovery. World Scientific Publishing

His second specialist subject area is Suicide Prevention, and the book on this subject, which is currently being translated into Japanese and Russian, is:

Henden, J. (2017). Preventing Suicide: the Solution Focused Approach. Second edition. Wiley-Blackwell

John's third specialist area is Solution Focused Stress Management and Resilience. (This is also referred to as Solution Focused Healthy Work-Life Balancing.)

As a counsellor and therapist for individual work, unsurprisingly, John’s preferred approach is Solution Focused. He finds this approach applicable to the widest range of mental health issues, including chronic depression, relationship difficulties, schizo-affective states, alcohol dependency; and, of course, acute stress and anxiety, trauma survivors and suicide prevention. Within the last 30 years, John has worked with some 400 individual clients from public, private and voluntary sector organisations.

As a trainer, in adopting an action-learning approach, John has an energetic and captivating teaching style, which enables participants to remain both alert and involved throughout. His alternating use of short presentations, audio visuals, paired and small group work, ensures not only all learning styles are catered for, but participants find the training both enjoyable and worthwhile.

See below for John's other workshops.

ZOOM Date & Details

Tuesday, 26 May 2026

9.00am - 3.30pm

You will be sent the details to access ZOOM after you have registered. This is an interactive workshop with breakout room activities and we therefore ask all participants to have their own computer / laptop with a working camera and mic as this makes interaction with the breakout room activities and discussions easier and enhances the learning for all.

Please Note: This workshop will not be recorded.

Book Training Now - 26 May